The weather is getting better as days go by and this morning it was beautiful. A fantastic way to wake up! It is interesting to see the contrasts since we had been here on the way up but couldn’t see a thing because of the fog and clouds. I find it rewarding to get these views on the way down. We are walking back on the exact same trail and it would probably had been a little bit monotonous to see the exact same. This way we still have something new to see and explore.
Today we had a shopping break in Namche. We were here on the way up and it is quite a big town with lots of interesting shops so we planned to stop here on the way down. It is just one hour from Kenjuma (where we slept last night) so the day got a very relaxed start.
Unfortunately I am not feeling any better with my cold, it seems to have been getting worse and the fact that I have to keep on walking without rest makes me not being able to enjoy the last days here properly. It has been hard to breathe when walking and I have been a little bit on a bad mood in general. I decided to listen to some music, which is something that I really have missed, in order to take my mind out of everything and trying to stay positive again. It helped a little bit, listening to Thomas Bergersens epic music together with the landscape made me feel like myself again for a short moment. When we got to Namche everything seemed to go away quite quickly and I really felt a strong need to be alone. I think I might not have been as nice as I should towards James and the girls and I don’t feel proud of that at all.
The sun seems to always shine in Namche. This and the fact that it is a really clean and organized town, with cozy cafes, made for a nice break early in the morning. Exactly what I needed. We shopped around with Caitlin and Anna and ended up in a store where a very nice lady really enjoyed showing us what she made with beads. She was extremely lovely so I bought a couple of things from her. After that we sat with James for some time inside a café where they played chill music in Spanish, we didn’t talk much but I felt better immediately.
For the first time in 11 days I got to turn on the wi-fi on my phone and sneak a peek into the world. It felt good for like two seconds but all of a sudden it just hit me that this is ending and that soon we are getting back to reality. It was nice to be able to talk to my mother who, for some weird reason, was awake at 4 am and replied to my messages right away. But on the other hand, I just got reminded that there is a normal life waiting for me and felt overwhelming. It also hit me that soon I will have to say goodbye to this gorgeous man who is sitting in front of me right now and who has definitely made a huge impact in how I see the world. It all felt like too much so I just turned off my phone.
The rest of the day went by in a blur. I listened to music for the most part and it really helped a lot getting my mind out of the fact that I am sick and that I do not feel like myself. I just want this cold to magically disappear but I know it will not happen. When we stop I feel really great and right now I am really looking forward get going again. There is something fascinating with walking, it is so simple and requires no conscious effort. Putting one foot in front of the other can be really therapeutic and that forward movement just makes me really happy and fulfilled. The lack of plans, commitments and obligations also clears up a lot of mental space which amazingly becomes available for other things. I have never felt more capable of everything as I feel right now, everything just seems possible and my negative inner voice has finally shut up. I only wish this could be like that forever.
Now that we have arrived at the tea house I can feel the vacation mode really kicking in. All the hard work is behind us and now I can really enjoy the feeling of accomplishment and the easy life. The only thing that is bringing me down a little bit is the fact that I am feeling more sick as the days go by, but I guess you cannot have everything. Now it is warm, sunny, we have a toilet that semi flushes and that IS a real luxury here.